When it rain's, its raining
Warm felicitations.
Last night, the VSL admenstruation had a pivotal meeting in which we disgust our leadership roles. We arrived at the conclusion that our admenstruation is perfect and needs no alterations.
After that productive meeting, we gave some thoughts to our in/outreach initiatives. And... ITS THAT TIME OF YEAR GAIN!!!
As Fall turns to Witner, so must VSL turn to. We bessech you are faithful reader's to spread the Holiday spirit, and tell "you're friends."
When should I tell them? "you ask." Our staff lunar psychologist has done some research and discovers that people are most receptive to VSL 20 minutes after eating any sheep related food prodcuts. (mutton is fine.) If you are nervous, put a lil sand in your mouth ahead of time to distract you while you talk. "works 32% of time!"
Still feeling pathetic and weak? thats okay. heres a sample.
Jarge: Hi Flarkess.
Flarkiss: Its actually Flarkist.
Jarge: Oh. Okay.
Flarkisst: So anyway how was the big game.
Jarge: Oh Flarissed it was so great.
Flarissa: Okay. Have you heard about VSL.
Jarge: No.
Flarasster: Its a exciting conglomerate in your area that supports many things like such as arts, and sex education.
Jarge: Wow! I'll apply.
So thats sort of like "(a) worst" case-scenario. Remember we are counting on your participation thats mandatory!
And also remember that we love you. Whether you are single, white, irate, menstruating, or incontinent, you are all children of VSL and we can find a way to use you.
Sending you all my undying love-- I think about you every minute of every day
spiceprez
